I have zero stake in seeing this movie succeed.
Most comic movies do pretty well because they retell the origin of any manner of peripheral noir cartoon characters based on some kind of social cliche.
GIJoe: Rise of Cobra will succeed in that sense because it was made for anyone who has not seen the cartoon aside from the theme song or the occasional “doll” sold for actual money on ebay, by grafting dialogue from the Marvel comic into the usual sci-fi eco-tech seen in every other popcorn flick of the summer.
The body armor in G.I. JOE looks like Robocop and Iron Man had hot monkey sex all night and gave birth to these metal suits.
Come friends, let us gather before the silver screen under the banner of multiculturalism and save the world from neoconservative tyranny.
I remember reading the comic where Cobra were the ones with the supertechology and the Joes fought back and won using only their .223 guts and patriotism. At least in the cartoon the Joes could set their laser rifle buttstock on the ground and salute the flag any time they wanted to.
I'm not going to go into the plot of G.I. Joe because there are a few surprises that I don't want to bump against and ruin, but the film does indeed show us how COBRA was formed.
ROC Baroness is a textbook homegrown terrorist, bridezilla stood up then involved in “ultra right-wing” espionage to avenge her spoiled honor. I don't watch the gossip network so WHO GIVES A DAMN. In this scene Duke&Rip, in spite of their optimized radness, are defeated by their own hubris. Oh folly the American military, hot damn that white chick is heroic.
In short, ROC will succeed for all the wrong reasons and still be abused by state media as anti-military propaganda.
Here's a job for real life special forces and it's not that mystical alien humping eugenics bullcrap.
